Friday, October 19, 2007


OK, so I need a bit of advice, or I guess I'd like to hear your views/experiences on something that is hard to do. My family and I have some friends that have been friends for a long time. It started out with our hubbies working together. Once we started having kids we all became friends, and would hang out occasionally, and see each other at company functions. We would even send birthday/Christmas gifts through our husbands to each other/kids etc. I even joined the wife's book club, since we have a love of reading in common. Since May of 2006 the guys haven't worked together, but they keep in touch. Since earlier this month, I don't attend the book club anymore. I actually can't stand the wife anymore, she talks tooo much about her bratty kids and how "cute" their antics are, AND she is not the kind of parent I strive to be (I actually reprimand MY kids when they run amok in other people's homes). I think my change in attitude is me finally becoming more aware of what I like and do not like in a friend. AND I am finally starting to make friends on my own (without having to use hubby's "work" as a starting ground). How do I "break-up" with them? I don't mind if my hubby stays in touch with her hubby, I just don't want to hang out with them ever again (with or without the kids)! I am getting sick of having to send gifts for B-Days, and having to come up with something for Christmas. AND it is getting expensive. Do I finish out the year with the same type of gifts I always buy (I DO want to be fair, don't I?), and then start next year anew, with just cards for B-Days and Christmas? (there is only 1 b-day then Christmas left this year) OR do I just cut off ties completely? They are the only non-family people we don't see on a regular basis that we have this "tradition" with. I don't want to hurt feelings, I just want to be done with it. So any advice you have, I would be grateful for.

1 Comment:

Anonymous said...

I don't think there is an easy way out of this "relationship". I think the idea of giving the last two gifts of the year is a good one and then just start sending cards next year if that's still what you want to do. And then when it comes time to hang out with them, give an excuse as to why you can't and once this happens a few times, I'm sure they'll get the hint or just stop inviting you. If they ask you about it, you can be blunt and say that your life is taking a different turn and you just don't have as much time and energy as you used to. Of course, it's easier said than done. Good luck!